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Terry Storch Dispatch w.02.2020
I'm often surprised to hear people say they're too busy to read. People who don't have time to read are people who don't make time to learn. —Adam Grant
The Reset Principal
Nearly twenty years ago, I learned a valuable lesson on what I now call The Reset Principal. My counselor, Jonathan, was working with me on navigating life with young kids and all that comes with that season of life. My challenge was that I had a great job that I loved, but it was intense and often stressful. Just like most jobs, it took a lot from me each day. My issue was that the transition from work to home was very rough. It was like a crash landing almost every day because I just had not learned to transition my mind once I left work. Because of this, I was getting really frustrated at my family and myself.
I needed to leave my boss role behind and step in to my most important roles—husband and father. I couldn’t figure out the path forward or see the “forest for the trees.” Jonathan shared a solution with me. He called it the “Honey, I’m home” solution. He realized that physical presence was not the same as full presence, and he needed a full mental reset to help him once he arrived home. Jonathan would enter his home and head to his bedroom. Then, he would change his clothes, wash his face, and make a full physical and mental reset before announcing that he was home. This was his strategy for a full reset, and afterwards, he was ready to be present and in the right frame of mind to be a husband and father.
The Reset Principal is important for us to embrace and implement in our lives in order to be at our best in each situation. We have our own methods and ways that we transition. Are you aware of yours? I am very susceptible of not transitioning well and not being fully present if I am on a work phone call on my entire drive home. On the other hand, if I manage the end of my day well between emails and texts, I am well on my way. Then, I honor my last calendar appointment blocked off for a workout and head to the gym. Because I plan this, I get in a solid workout, sauna, and shower before heading home. Music and activity have a big effect on my ability to transition home well, so I listen to a relaxing Spotify playlist from the gym to my home. When I do this, I am in a much better space to be fully present physically and mentally. I am still far from perfect, but having the Reset Principal as a mindset and in full practice is a key for transitioning home well.
I would love to hear if you use a method to help “reset” you and how it works for you.
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What do you need to stop? This is one of the most powerful questions that is extremely hard to answer. With the New Year upon us, it’s one that I am seeing in articles and posts more often. My friend, Dan, has it listed in his article, but he is using it in a very creative way. Check out his post about “Three Questions that Invent the Future and Defeat Stagnation.” Read Now
My pastor, Craig Groeschel, kicked off the year with a powerful series geared toward men called Warrior. The first message is called “When It’s Time To Throw A Punch.” (Watch Now) There is so much great content that is applicable to men and women alike. A key point I absolutely loved was, “Victory isn’t always what you conquer later. Victory is being faithful and obedient today.” This reminded me of a thought I shared with all of my digerati leaders at the end of the year:
You don't need to get to the end of your struggle to experience wholeness. Jesus wants to quiet your spirit with His love and perfect your trust in Him. You can weather this storm complete in Him.
“There’s No Such Thing as ‘Quality’ Time.” What do you think about that statement? When I read it from Ryan Holiday, it caused me to pause. It was one of those titles that I read and honestly disagreed with. I almost just moved right past it. However, when something rubs me the wrong way, I choose to look into it more. This article was fantastic and had some really great points that I think you will enjoy. Read Now
When you realize there is no such thing as "quality time," when you become okay with "garbage time," you end up getting the best kind of time there is. You get the moment right in front of you. —Ryan Holiday
As the New Year kicks off, there are a handful of services I am thankful for and highly recommend.
Weight Watchers. - Ha! Yes, the WW. I started Weight Watchers at the end August with Robin and my mom. I had been struggling to lose weight, and just decided to get on board with what Robin and my mom were doing. The program is awesome, and the mobile app is outstanding! I have built some great habits, learned a new simple system and have lost 22 pounds, and am 3 pounds from my goal! Weight comes off slow for me, but this feels very sustainable. Here is a referral code if you're interested in a free month.
You Need A Budget (YNAB) - If I did an audit of the dispatch, my guess is budgeting would be one of the top topics I share and discuss. I am not going to apologize for that. I am going to continue to preach how important a budget is for you no matter what your financial situation is. (You’re welcome!) Robin and I have been on a budget for all of our 21+ years of marriage and that simple decision has been a huge, positive factor in our lives. YNAB is the best tool I have found, and I highly recommend it. Here is a referral code where you can get a free month. If you are new to YNAB, I also highly recommend some videos from Nick True. He is a YNAB expert and has some awesome tips and recommendations. YNAB for Beginners.
Wealthfront - Last but certainly not least...Wealthfront. (Finances again, I know!) Wealthfront is an easy way to plan, save, and invest. You open their site and see, “Your easiest financial decision.” I have fallen in love with this service and absolutely love what it offers. Super low fees, easy-to-use mobile app, and killer investment and savings offerings that just make saving and investing fun and easy. Here is a referral code where you can save a little on the already-low fees.
The top 3 books I’ve read recently and recommend.
This is a tremendous book that is on my “must read” list. Don’t let the subtitle scare you off if you are not in the workplace. This book has principals that far extend the workplace and can and should be applied at home and in parenting and relationships.
Hope Rising: How the Science of HOPE Can Change Your Life
A friend turned me onto this book, and then, I got to meet and hear one of the authors at a small roundtable meeting in Tulsa recently. This book is chock full of mindset shifts that can bring so much practical value to our everyday lives.
Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones
Last year as a family we kicked off a book study using James Clear’s Atomic Habits, and it was great. I had read the book previously and really wanted to bring the concepts and learnings to our family. In starting the New Year, move this book to the top of your list right now if you haven’t read it.