“The ultimate freedom we have as human beings is the power to select what we will allow or require our minds to dwell upon.” - Dallas Willard

I’ve been having some delightful conversations with my best friends about being unhurried. One of the most ironic of all these conversations was all about the deep desire of living the unhurried life, but some of the steps to get there were taking too long. Basically, it was about hurrying to the unhurried life. That’s ironic, don't you think? A little too ironic, as Alanis Morissette would say. 

I feel this deep allure toward the unhurried life, the desire to be able to fully unplug from the chaos, and just rest in Shalom. But the honest reality for me is that I struggle to break the addiction of connectedness. I don’t know how to really be bored, to have nothing to do, or let my mind wander freely. I know this because if I am in line or in my car waiting for anything, I pull out my phone. It seems I’ll do anything to avoid being bored. How about you? Can you just wait in the stillness with only your thoughts? 

‘One of the greatest dangers to the apprenticeship of Jesus is the exhaustion from the over busy life.” - John Mark Comer

The over busy life is something I get all too well. We also need to talk about the over-busy life caused by our own self-induced distractions from connection. Having 24/7 connectivity to anything we can imagine is leading us to extreme loneliness. We need to face the reality that connection and connectedness are not the same as authentic community. We can have connections and “friends” on our social channels and be completely alone. Sherry Turkle speaks of this very challenge in her fantastic Ted talk. 

My counselor is helping me see the value of my thoughts and feelings—sitting with them, understanding them, and naming them. For me, doing this can be a very scary thing. As a driven, Enneagram 8 who likes to control things and who really only understands the emotion of anger, sitting with my thoughts, feelings and emotions is really uncomfortable. Both distraction and connection become the enemies of really understanding myself and where I am mentally, spiritually and physically. 

“People are lonely. The network is seductive. But if we are always on, we may deny ourselves the rewards of solitude.”  ― Sherry Turkle, Alone Together

The reward of solitude!? That might not sound like much of a reward, but I am starting to believe it is just that — a reward! I have oriented parts of my day and my life around this. If you want to try this or learn some practical steps for starting, I highly recommend watching this 9 min video from John Mark Comer. 

JMC gives some really great and practical steps for getting started. For me, I start everyday with the YouVersion Guided Prayer. I play the background audio that is built in, and it allows me to sit in the quiet and come before God in a still space. This has been a great help to me—framing my posture and easing my spirit in the morning before I begin to read and engage in the Scriptures. 

Now, something we must be aware of and keep our guard up about is the false sense of intimacy. This can happen in our relationships, and I also believe this can happen with our relationship with Jesus. The mission of YouVersion is all about people growing in their intimacy with God, which is very near to my heart. Our intimacy and relationship with Jesus must be more than opening an app, more than just checking a box, and more than expanding a streak. Intimacy with Jesus is all about a relationship! 

“When technology engineers intimacy, relationships can be reduced to mere connections. And then, easy connection becomes redefined as intimacy.”  ― Sherry Turkle, Alone Together

As I continue the messy journey into a life that pursues Jesus, becoming His apprentice, and continuing to work towards a life that is unhurried, I invite you to join as you see fit. I will continue to share my discoveries, my learnings, and my failures. What is very clear is that following Jesus and being His apprentice is very countercultural no matter where you live or work. It will look different and will likely cause concern to many. Make no doubt about it: it will not be congruent with the cultures and systems many engage with. But it will be so worth it. Until next time, walk slower, breathe deeper, receive grace, and enjoy the easy yoke of Jesus. 

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” - ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭11:28-30‬